Photos, pub lunches, sexy undies, glarebears and the beige invasion

Ahh what an excellent day yesterday turned out to be. It started, as all good days should, with a pub lunch. So we kicked our hangovers out the door and engaged in an excellent people watching excercise, characters included, "the absent robotic waitresses scared assistant", "the snaggletoothed barman who didn't have the authority", "the incredibly slow chewing couple" and last but by no means least "the women whose burger was disgusting". So with our hunger more than taken care of we headed for southend seafront and the birth place of the phrase "Glare Bear". The miserable weather provided the perfect backdrop for photos of the great british public and things started off well when Shiv spotted a jolly women throwing chips to a crowd of seagulls, the womens face was a picture when hearing Shiv remark "Whoa look at those birds, they've got spaceheads." Shiv also spotted an amazing machine selling "Sexy Undies" each pair comes with a free dose of gonnereah, I'm sure. After taking a few photos of the elderly, sexy undies and seagulls we headed for the pier, or the great southend tourist swindle as it should be called. We had previously discussed that neither of us had been to the pier for a good 12 years but were still both shocked to discover that it cost more than 75p to walk down. A full £3 later and with an unjustified scalding from the ticket women to "TAKE YOUR RECEIPT" we set off on our jaunt. On our journey we were overtaken by a man with a walking stick and various family's pushing relatives in wheelchairs. I have convinced myself that this is more a comment on how many times we stopped to take photographs than on mine and Siobhan's physical fitness. When we reached the end of the pleasure pier we were confronted with a magnificent sight. Southend Piers Main Attraction


We also saw an old women who had the brightest ginger hair I have ever seen. She was a true beauty and her husbands plans to "go down to the cockle cafe for a nice cuppa" systematically broke and warmed our hearts. Other sights included, workmen bending over, a pidgeon leaving the lifeboat gift shop and talking telescopes that "smelt of other peoples eyes". These cosmopoliton exploits left our heads in a spin and after spending quite a while trying to coax a pidgeon onto the "Weigh yourself" machines for the perfect photo we decided it was time to head back. We Waited at the pier train station and watched as reams of the elderly and bewildered (or The Beige Invasion) milled around the end of the pier.

The train ride back was bumpy to say the least. Shiv almost caused herslef a mischeif trying to take a photograph and being banged in the head


But this was simply practice for her love hate relationship with the slush puppy she bought once we were back on the golden mile. Brain Freeze


Ahh an excellent day indeed. More pictures will be uploaded by either me (http://www.flickr.com/photos/33608281@N04/)
or shiv (http://www.flickr.com/photos/betty_bingo/) on flickr.