I'd Give Last Week A B+

Well last week was a week of 'B's by all accounts. Brothers, Book launches, Birthday's, BBQs, Booze and Bashing on the guitar at gigs (I know that last one was poor). I may well elaborate later on the events but all I'll say for now is what a jolly week it was. I've also been trying for some time to get my script on here in some link format to save having to post it in its entirety, but sadly to no avail. So I'll say now if anyone would like to read my six minute short film script tell me your e-mail address and I'll gladly send it to you for your criticisms, constructive or otherwise.

Oh and a very short notice one.
come to this

Photos, pub lunches, sexy undies, glarebears and the beige invasion

Ahh what an excellent day yesterday turned out to be. It started, as all good days should, with a pub lunch. So we kicked our hangovers out the door and engaged in an excellent people watching excercise, characters included, "the absent robotic waitresses scared assistant", "the snaggletoothed barman who didn't have the authority", "the incredibly slow chewing couple" and last but by no means least "the women whose burger was disgusting". So with our hunger more than taken care of we headed for southend seafront and the birth place of the phrase "Glare Bear". The miserable weather provided the perfect backdrop for photos of the great british public and things started off well when Shiv spotted a jolly women throwing chips to a crowd of seagulls, the womens face was a picture when hearing Shiv remark "Whoa look at those birds, they've got spaceheads." Shiv also spotted an amazing machine selling "Sexy Undies" each pair comes with a free dose of gonnereah, I'm sure. After taking a few photos of the elderly, sexy undies and seagulls we headed for the pier, or the great southend tourist swindle as it should be called. We had previously discussed that neither of us had been to the pier for a good 12 years but were still both shocked to discover that it cost more than 75p to walk down. A full £3 later and with an unjustified scalding from the ticket women to "TAKE YOUR RECEIPT" we set off on our jaunt. On our journey we were overtaken by a man with a walking stick and various family's pushing relatives in wheelchairs. I have convinced myself that this is more a comment on how many times we stopped to take photographs than on mine and Siobhan's physical fitness. When we reached the end of the pleasure pier we were confronted with a magnificent sight. Southend Piers Main Attraction


We also saw an old women who had the brightest ginger hair I have ever seen. She was a true beauty and her husbands plans to "go down to the cockle cafe for a nice cuppa" systematically broke and warmed our hearts. Other sights included, workmen bending over, a pidgeon leaving the lifeboat gift shop and talking telescopes that "smelt of other peoples eyes". These cosmopoliton exploits left our heads in a spin and after spending quite a while trying to coax a pidgeon onto the "Weigh yourself" machines for the perfect photo we decided it was time to head back. We Waited at the pier train station and watched as reams of the elderly and bewildered (or The Beige Invasion) milled around the end of the pier.

The train ride back was bumpy to say the least. Shiv almost caused herslef a mischeif trying to take a photograph and being banged in the head


But this was simply practice for her love hate relationship with the slush puppy she bought once we were back on the golden mile. Brain Freeze


Ahh an excellent day indeed. More pictures will be uploaded by either me (http://www.flickr.com/photos/33608281@N04/)
or shiv (http://www.flickr.com/photos/betty_bingo/) on flickr.

This week is shaping up to be very pleasing indeed. I spent last night recording two songs or rather Dave spent last night recording two of my songs and I'm pretty pleased with how they've turned out. Both pretty simple recordings, vocals and guitar (albeit Dave's 12 string guitar in places) but I like them nonetheless. This afternoon has been mostly spent sitting in the sheltered sun of the garden reading The Plague. Perhaps not the most "summery" of summer reads, but there we are. I even have a little colour now which has made me look a little less like the anemic Goth I saw in an old photo I found whilst sorting out my old GCSE folders. It was quite strange to see all my old school books, but did make me laugh to see that in place of a parent’s signature in my homework diary were the names "Colonel Mustard" "Sophie's Mum" and "The Cat" for three successive weeks. I am guessing that the angry red signature next to them means my head of year was informed of this most grievous act. Apparently I also have permission to wear trainers until the 25/1/02 a right which I can only hope I capitalised on. I also found an old poetry/lyric book from when I was around 14. Angst is not the word! Some of it was pretty hard to read, at least without pangs of embarrassment and guilt at what a self-righteous little thing I was, I certainly did have the teen blinkers on when I was that age. I think my favourite embarrassing line was

"I feel like a piece of gum
Stuck underneath the table of life."

Very deep, I'm sure.

Tonight me and Siobhan are finally going to watch Slumdog Millionaire and tomorrow will be a day spent taking photographs of the great unwashed, either that or we'll find a nice little country scene.

So yes, a very pleasing start to the week!

If eyes are the window to the soul then my soul is red and itchy.

Conjunctivitis? I wouldn't bother with it, it's pretty rubbish as infections fair. Though it does give you the exciting feeling of being blind every morning when you can't open your eyes for the gunk. So you know, maybe not be that bad. My eyes are actually getting better, still red as anything but they are no where near as swollen as they were. I should think I'll be completely cured by the gig at Bar Lambs on saturday. Oh, you should come. here is a photograph I took of myself to prove how bad my eyes were.

Aint nothing but a hound dog

Ahh Me, Shiv, David and many others donned our darndest animal get up this weekend for Amy's nature party and an excellent night was had by all. Shiv dressed up as a terrifying panda (Michael jackson/Brian May influenced) and Dave was a crazy croc! They both arrived when before most people had got into their porper costumes so their entrance was magnified tenfold. They definately got my vote for best dressed, though they did look a little like the last day of a holiday camp kids club! Ha ha. I unfortunately did not make as much effort, coming dressed as a dog. Although I hope that my face painting skills made up for my lack of full costume. I played a set which hopefully went down well and have possibly got a gig in Laaandaaan out of it, fingers crossed! Spent the rest of the night dancing the "bum shuffle" with Shiv and laughing till we couldn't breathe! I also performed my old faithful trick, a game I like to call "Shiv, I've lost everything I own". The Basic rules are

1. I look around the room in a drunken haze and notice that all my possession aren't immediately at my disposle.

2. I check my pockets and when I find nothing I say to Shiv in a voice somewhere between depression and despair "Shiv I've lost everything I own".

3. Siobhan spends approximately 3 seconds finding my things for me.

4. I feel silly but glad to have a swell pal.

Afterwards Me, Shiv and Dave headed back to theirs and Shiv prepared some drunken snacks (that I actually completely forgot about untill about 8pm last night)

Ahh a great night and beauty of a weekend,

Cheers!

The most interesting thing to have happened to me in ages.

I have recently discovered that I HATE Salvo the Clown's nose.



Photo by Lee Arty Smokes

Feeling Chipper, Wealthy Tipper.

I am feeling rather fine and dandy today and was in a particularly swell mood for most of yesterday. I think there may be something in the air, because it definately can't be the weather that's put me in the most finest of fine fancies. Rain, sun, rain, sun, rain, rain, SLEET.....and sun. That's how I would describe today if I were Michael Fish, or perhaps Jeremy Paxman as shown in this little gem.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HMAt8ZXqtbc

Spent a fun and boozy one round Shiv's last night but seem to have made it through without a hangover, very pleasant. I must've been all the pears in the "el soleill" (Don't think that's right what was it called shiv?)mighty fine box 'o' wine I dare say. Siobhan excelled herself with the selection of trash TV brought to the table, my personal favourite comment of the night being, "A drunk woman? 8 months pregnant? attacks a policeman?? YESSS!!!" It truly was right up our streets, or should I say our Street-Crime Uk's.

I spent a rainy unemployed day taking photos of things in my house and pretending to be good at it. It was fun. Here are a few of my attempts. I have been told that the pic of my toes was "a perfect example of a photographic cliche" Oh Well...







I have also put a few new (old) recordings up on this site www.myspace.com/dearcharles They are all pretty poor quality recordings, done on either my digital camera or mp3 player. Still perhaps it adds character.